Management at Edmonton-based talk-radio station 630 CHED are concerned about the health of Ryan Jesperson, who hosts a three-hour shift weekdays at 9 a.m. The radio personality has been reportedly been acting strangely as if in a state of overwhelming shock, bewilderment and frustration every time he signs off.

“I’ve never seen him like this before,” said one staff member. “He continuously plugs his hears singing ‘La, la, la, I can’t hear you!’ and makes slashing gestures against his throat. He’s also faked shooting himself in the head, with his index finger pointed at one of his temples.”

Another staffer suggested a lot of that behavior is a result of Jesperson banging his head against the edge of his desk during commercials after fielding phone and text feedback from irate alt-right listeners, as well as the occasional leftie who offers rainbows and unicorns perspectives on current events.

“I suspect he’s suffered a myriad of concussions from those actions,” offered one manager. “If this carries on, he may have to take some time off for the sake of his mental health, maybe even hospitalization.”

Should the CHED brass choose that option, the roster will undoubtedly change by splitting the CHED Afternoon News duo of J’Lyn Nye and Andrew Grose. Nye will likely stay in the 3 p.m. slot, while Grose may occupy Jesperson’s shift.

“Andrew’s stoked about going solo for three hours in the interim,” says another manager. “He loves regaling his audience with all those exciting stories about him getting coffee from Tim Hortons every day. Our audiences who have nothing else better to do absolutely live and die for that stuff.”

 

 

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