In the wake of the bombing in Manchester on Monday and subsequent threats by ISIS that outdoor festivals will be targeted, two festivals in Alberta have revealed plans on how they plan to weed out terrorists.
The Edmonton Folk Music Festival plan involves escorting spectators through the gates in groups of 20, but only after they are able to sing at least the first verse and chorus of Ian Tyson’s “Four Strong Winds,” which has doubled as the event’s closer for years. Anyone spotted muffing the lines will be promptly removed from the site and placed under arrest. Those able to sing the entire song will be rewarded with a seating location closer to the stage.
“We understand that this measure will increase wait times, but every hardy folk fest fan loves a singalong to pass the time,” said one festival organizer. “And it just might be a hoot to see who gets the cuffs slapped on them.”
“Think of it more like a drinking game without the alcohol,” added another organizer. “But the chances of incarceration adds to the pressure and entertainment value for the patrons.”
Meanwhile, Big Valley Jamboree, the country festival that takes place in Camrose each August, has created a plan that doesn’t involve as much protocol.
“Hell, all we gotta do is check out anyone who doesn’t look like they belong,” said one festival official. “That’s when we just beat the crap out of them.”